Broken Promises

Psa 18:30
The one true God acts in a faithful manner; the Lord’s promise is reliable; he is a shield to all who take shelter in him.

The last 2 days, victor have been messaging me saying that he wanted to leave the church due to conflicts between him and someone in the church. Also, there had been many misunderstandings and problems between him and some people in the church as well.

One of the issues that he raised was that a promise made to him by someone in the church that he felt was important was not fulfilled.

I do not know the details and will not attempt to pass any form of remark or judgement for it may not be the truth.

I'm not sure whether I should be blogging about this and I'll just pray that my words here will be guided by the holy spirit and do not seem hurtful to anyone that may be reading my blog.

Psa24:3-24:6
Who is allowed to ascend the mountain of the Lord?
Who may go up to his holy dwelling place?
The one whose deeds are blameless
and whose motives are pure,
who does not lie,
or make promises with no intention of keeping them.
Such godly people are rewarded by the Lord,
and vindicated by the God who delivers them.
Such purity characterizes the people who seek his favor,
Jacob’s descendants, who pray to him.

Our God is a God that honour promises. Not a single promise that he had made to Israel or to Moses was left unfulfilled and the verse above repeats that we as Christians should not make promises with no intention of keeping them and we should try our very best to honour every promise that we make to people and to God.

Definately, we are not God. We are only human that are prone to errors with limited time and limited capabilities and God knows about it.

I'm sure that at some point in your life, some one have disappointed you or betrayed your trust by not fulfilling his promise to you. It could be missing a dinner appointment or failing to produce a report that he promised to do.

The issue here I hope to address is not about how to honour your promises to God and people around you but how to make sure that you do not make empty promises to people.

I for one understands that when a promise held strongly by a person is unfulfilled, it could easily lead to conflict or resentment due to a sense of betrayal and lost hope. I am trying my best not to make commitments that I may be unable or unwilling to carry out. Instead of saying I will do it or I "promise", I do not wish to hurt people by saying something that I do not mean from the bottom of my heart or I may not fulfill due to constrains in time or capability.

I know that I do not have the capability or the heart for people around me now to make many promises that I know that I can and will keep. But I pray that God will soften my heart for the people around me to care for them and to value their needs more than mine.

Just now, Victor messaged me again and said again that he would like to leave the church. I just pray that God will guide him in the right path that he has meant for him and that as much as I would like him to join our church, I believe that there are some issues that he has to resolve at his old church. Whether or not he eventually becomes my spiritual brother in the church is of secondory importance as long as he finds himself closer to the lord.

It is often not of our will and ways but of God's will and timing to bring someone closer to them. All we can do as Christians is to be living testimonies of God in our lives and in other people's lives.

The rest is up to God.

Put on the helmet of salvation.
We have hope in our lives.
We have a destiny to fulfill for the Lord.
We are overcomers.

Size of Faith

And a poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, worth less than a penny. He called his disciples and said to them, “I tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the offering box than all the others. For they all gave out of their wealth. But she, out of her poverty, put in what she had to live on, everything she had.” -Mark12:42-44

I came across this verse in my quiet time this morning and it really hit me once again that what this verse was really talking about was not the amount of money that you give but rather the amount of faith you have when you give.

When the poor widow gave, she must have struggled within her as the money she gave could have feed her for a meal but she gave out of faith. She believed that the lord would bless her with more in her life as she gave out all she had to the lord.

Giving out of poverty and not of wealth, isn't this a great show of faith to the lord?

The Lord wants us to sarcrifice the most important object that you so hold dearly to your heart before you can draw closer to him, and he closer to you. Only then can his blessings for you come through.

Another story to share:

As a young man preparing to go to China, Hudson Taylor determined to learn to live by faith alone while he was still in England. His resolve was “to learn before leaving England to move man through God by prayer alone.” He worked for a doctor and was paid quarterly. When the time drew near to receive his salary, Taylor was disturbed that his employer said nothing about it. Taylor had only one half-crown piece, but he determined not to break his resolution and ask for his salary.
While visiting a needy home on the Lord’s Day, Taylor felt led of God to give his last coin to the needy family. The next day he received an anonymous gift through the mail, four times what he had given to the poor! The following Saturday, the doctor finished up his work and said, “Taylor, is not your salary due again?” Taylor told him that it was and became disappointed when he learned that the doctor had forgotten about the salary due and sent all his funds to the bank! He prayed about the matter (for he had bills of his own to pay) and left it with the Lord.
That evening, the doctor visited him and said that one of his richest patients had come over after hours to pay his bill! He gave the money to Taylor, who rejoiced. He had learned he could trust God and therefore go to China as a missionary.
Wycliffe Handbook of Preaching & Preachers, W. Wiersbe, p. 240

I have just received my pay this week but I'm a little tight as I was in the hospital for quite long last month and did not work much so my pay for this month is low but I will still set apart some money for my family and for my monthly tithing. I pray that the lord would also show me people to bless even with just $400 as I know and place my trust in him to provide for me.

I'll just end this with a famous phrase.

“If the Lord bid me fly, I should trust Him for the wings.” John Wesley

Perserverance of Faith

Matt 6:25-34“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Isn’t there more to life than food and more to the body than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky: They do not sow, or reap, or gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren’t you more valuable than they are? And which of you by worrying can add even one hour to his life? Why do you worry about clothing? Think about how the flowers of the field grow; they do not work or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his glory was clothed like one of these! And if this is how God clothes the wild grass, which is here today and tomorrow is tossed into the fire to heat the oven, won’t he clothe you even more, you people of little faith? So then, don’t worry saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear?’ For the unconverted pursue these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But above all pursue his kingdom and righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. So then, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today has enough trouble of its own.

Last Sunday, P.S Eugene repeats this famous part of the bible before the sermon by P.S Khong. I believe that many have heard of this or some version of this part of the bible even if they are non-believers.

But as believers, do you have faith that God will grant you your needs if you seek his kingdom and righteousness first or do you just say it but do not complement it in action?

Just to share with you: Initially, when I just became a Christian a few months back, I was also skeptical about this. I had my own reservations about tithing and giving to the lord. I felt that my family ( or I myself) needed the money for our own daily expenditure. Even when I received my 1st pay-check of about $800, I did not consider tithing 10% of the money to the lord but only wanted to tithe what I thought was reasonable.

The time, my dad had some problems with his business and had just started being a property agent and business was not really looking good at that time.

One night, when I was coming back from a dinner with my friends, I walked past an AXN machine next to the 7-11 below my place. God just spoke to me to tithe 10% of my salary to the lord and my father's business would improve. Immediately, I decided to just tithe to him using the AXN machine.

When I reached home, I received news that my dad had closed a room! Hallejuleh!

This continued for a few days and I praised the lord for blessing us in the family.

However, my dad credited the deals to his own capabilities rather than to the Lord's help in the family. I was sad but I never stopped tithing or praying that my dad would understand the glory and grace of the lord in our family.

For the next 2 months, we had a little problem financially as my dad had difficulty closing rooms. He learnt that it was less of his capability but more of luck (God's grace as I see it) that he could close the rooms. Nevertheless, I believed that the lord will bless us as he is a faithful God.

Just this month, prayers were answered. My dad had more opportunities in his security businesses and things were looking brighter in the family financially.

Yesterday, when I reached home, my dad thanked God for helping him financially for the 1st time. I was shocked. When I talked to him, I realised that he was busy with some security business in the morning, yet he was able to close 2 rooms in the night for $900. He finally starts to realise that it was God that was helping him all along.

I believe that our God is faithful to his word. But we must be patient to wait for his timing and not ours. Even when we face difficulty in life, we must have faith that God will come true at the end if we seek his kingdom and righteousness first. Below is a story to share.

Who was United States Senator Edmund G. Ross of Kansas? I suppose you could call him a “Mr. Nobody.” No law bears his name. Not a single list of Senate “greats” mentions his service. Yet when Ross entered the Senate in 1866, he was considered the man to watch. He seemed destined to surpass his colleagues, but he tossed it all away by one courageous act of conscience. Let’s set the stage.
Conflict was dividing our government in the wake of the Civil War. President Andrew Johnson was determined to follow Lincoln’s policy of reconciliation toward the defeated South. Congress, however, wanted to rule the downtrodden Confederate states with an iron hand.
Congress decided to strike first. Shortly after Senator Ross was seated, the Senate introduced impeachment proceedings against the hated President. The radicals calculated that they needed thirty-six votes, and smiled as they concluded that the thirty-sixth was none other than Ross.’ The new senator listened to the vigilante talk. But to the surprise of many, he declared that the president “deserved as fair a trial as any accused man has ever had on earth.” The word immediately went out that his vote was “shaky.”
Ross received an avalanche of anti-Johnson telegrams from every section of the country. Radical senators badgered him to “come to his senses.”
The fateful day of the vote arrived. The courtroom galleries were packed. Tickets for admission were at an enormous premium.
As a deathlike stillness fell over the Senate chamber, the vote began. By the time they reached Ross, twenty-four “guilties” had been announced. Eleven more were certain. Only Ross’ vote was needed to impeach the President. Unable to conceal his emotion, the Chief Justice asked in a trembling voice, “Mr. Senator Ross, how vote you? Is the respondent Andrew Johnson guilty as charged?”
Ross later explained, at that moment, “I looked into my open grave. Friendships, position, fortune, and everything that makes life desirable to an ambitions man were about to be swept away by the breath of my mouth, perhaps forever.”
Then, the answer came -- unhesitating, unmistakable: “Not guilty!” With that, the trial was over. And the response was as predicted. A high public official from Kansas wired Ross to say: “Kansas repudiates you as she does all perjurers and skunks.”
The “open grave” vision had become a reality. Ross’ political career was in ruins. Extreme ostracism, and even physical attack awaited his family upon their return home.
One gloomy day Ross turned to his faithful wife and said, “Millions cursing me today will bless me tomorrow…though not but God can know the struggle it has cost me.” It was a prophetic declaration.
Twenty years later Congress and the Supreme Court verified the wisdom of his position, by changing the laws related to impeachment. Ross was appointed Territorial Governor of New Mexico. Then, just prior to his death, he was awarded a special pension by Congress. The press and country took this opportunity to honor his courage which, they finally concluded, had saved our country from crisis and division.
Courage - You Can Stand Strong in the Face of Fear, Jon Johnston, 1990, SP Publications, pp.56-58

What struck me the most about the story is that the rewards for his faith was not regonised till 20 years later.

Do not worry. Seek to please the lord 1st and then faithfully believe that he will provide.

Hebrews 11:1. “What is faith, unless it is to believe what you cannot see.”

I pray for those whose prayers may not be answered to continue preservering in your faith and do not give up and wait for his appointed time.

Our Lord is a faithful God. Amen.

Go Deep

Look Far

Dream Big

Walking in Faith

I would like to share with all of you a story to start the day.

The Law of the Pedulum

In college I was asked to prepare a lesson to teach my speech class. We were to be graded on our creativity and ability to drive home a point in a memorable way. The title of my talk was, “The Law of the Pendulum.” I spent 20 minutes carefully teaching the physical principle that governs a swinging pendulum.
The law of the pendulum is: A pendulum can never return to a point higher than the point from which it was released. Because of friction and gravity, when the pendulum returns, it will fall short of its original release point. Each time it swings it makes less and less of an arc, until finally it is at rest. This point of rest is called the state of equilibrium, where all forces acting on the pendulum are equal.
I attached a 3-foot string to a child’s toy top and secured it to the top of the blackboard with a thumbtack. I pulled the top to one side and made a mark on the blackboard where I let it go. Each time it swung back I made a new mark. It took less than a minute for the top to complete its swinging and come to rest. When I finished the demonstration, the markings on the blackboard proved my thesis.
I then asked how many people in the room BELIEVED the law of the pendulum was true. All of my classmates raised their hands, so did the teacher. He started to walk to the front of the room thinking the class was over. In reality it had just begun.
Hanging from the steel ceiling beams in the middle of the room was a large, crude but functional pendulum (250 pounds of metal weights tied to four strands of 500-pound test parachute cord.).
I invited the instructor to climb up on a table and sit in a chair with the back of his head against a cement wall. Then I brought the 250 pounds of metal up to his nose. Holding the huge pendulum just a fraction of an inch from his face, I once again explained the law of the pendulum he had applauded only moments before, “If the law of the pendulum is true, then when I release this mass of metal, it will swing across the room and return short of the release point. Your nose will be in no danger.”
After that final restatement of this law, I looked him in the eye and asked, “Sir, do you believe this law is true?”
There was a long pause. Huge beads of sweat formed on his upper lip and then weakly he nodded and whispered, “Yes.”
I released the pendulum. It made a swishing sound as it arced across the room. At the far end of its swing, it paused momentarily and started back. I never saw a man move so fast in my life. He literally dived from the table.
Deftly stepping around the still-swinging pendulum, I asked the class, “Does he believe in the law of the pendulum?”
The students unanimously answered, “NO!”

Ken Davis, How To Speak To Youth, pp. 104-106

Does this sound similar to our faith in the Lord?

Every Sunday, we go down the church proclaiming that the Lord is alive, singing songs of worship. However, when we leave the church, we do not act as if the Lord is alive in us and in our lives.

What is Faith?

After hearing the sermon by P.S Khong yesterday, I was convinced more that works and faith goes hand in hand. With faith, nothing is impossible.

Works without Faith is dead but Faith without works is dead Faith.

I truely believe that by his stripes I will be healed and I believe that the miracle sunday on Easter have healed my sickness. I believe that the root problem have been cured. I do not just believe in it, I know I have been healed. (This does not mean I will stop taking my medicine, I would still have to raise my iron levels although my root problem is healed).

Yesterday, I came down to the altar again to ask for healing. This time round, it was for my bowel problems that have been plagueing me for quite some time. Due to digestive problems, I would have diahorrea every morning without fail and this have been sapping my energy and giving me lots of problems. Just to testify, I did not have diahorrea this morning and the cramps have stopped. Thank the lord for his healing.

A miracle, derived from the old Latin word miraculum meaning "something wonderful", is a striking interposition of divine intervention by a god in the universe by which the ordinary course and operation of Nature is overruled, suspended, or modified. - Wikipedia.

I know many people who come to churches just wanting to see miracles, see people stand up and walk. They want to see things happen supernaturally. Maybe a flying pastor, or the Lord appearing on the stage as the guest speaker for the day. Only then will they CONSIDER believing in God.

But truely, I believe that faith is the belief in God and acting because of that belief rather than seeing then "believing".

The Christian walk is a walk by faith and not by sight. The best miracle that people can see is not the miracles that happen for other people but miracles that happen for your own lives.

Will you stand up in faith and claim the miracles that God have prepared for your life and not just being contented to see miracles in other people's lives?

Stand firmly in the ship manned by the Lord and do not continue to try to row our own sampans full of holes.

Only then can we dare to look beyond the horizons and dream to reach the shores that the Lord have prepared for us.

Go Deep
Look Far
Dream Big

Weapon of Praise

On Easter Sunday, I brought my friend Victor down to the alter and prayed for both my healing and his healing. And the Lord have indeed answered to us in a positive manner. My blood count have gone up (though my stomach is still giving me problems) and Victor, though have not told me about the actually results of his test but have been showing signs of recovery. Iwould start by 1st giving thanks to God and to the people who have supported me all along.


1stly, Thank God that my haemoglobin counts have gone up from 8.7 to about 9.6 and I pray that he would continue to heal me in this area. Thank him for bringing Victor down for service on Sunday and for bringing him back you as he rededicated his life to the Lord again.

2ndly, I would also like to thank my spiritual family for keeping me in prayers and for taking time off their busty schedule to visit me. I would like to give thanks to my biological family for the financial support and the concern they have shown me. I would also like to thank my colleagues at Starhub for taking time off to visit me and showing concern for me when I was not feeling too well the last few days. Really appreciate it guys.

(Psalm 9:1-3) "I will praise thee, O Lord, with my whole heart; I will shew forth all thy marvellous works. I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy name. O thou most High. When mine enemies are turned back, they shall fall and perish at thy presence."

I read this verse along with my daily bread this morning and I just felt touched by the message today. I then decided to read up more about the power of praise. I stumbled upon this story in the bible about the lord giving Jehoshaphat military success.

2 Chronicles 20:1-22 Later the Moabites and Ammonites, along with some of the Meunites, attacked Jehoshaphat. Messengers arrived and reported to Jehoshaphat, “A huge army is attacking you from the other side of the Dead Sea, from the direction of Edom. Look, they are in Hazezon Tamar (that is, En Gedi).” Jehoshaphat was afraid, so he decided to seek the Lord’s advice. He decreed that all Judah should observe a fast. The people of Judah Lord’s help; they came from all the cities of Judah to ask for the Lord’s help. assembled to ask for the

Jehoshaphat stood before the assembly of Judah and Jerusalem at the Lord’s temple, in front of the new courtyard. He prayed: “O Lord God of our ancestors, you are the God who lives in heaven and rules over all the kingdoms of the nations. You possess strength and power; no one can stand against you. Our God, you drove out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and gave it as a permanent possession to the descendants of your friend Abraham. They settled down in it and built in it a temple to honor you, ‘If disaster comes on us in the form of military attack, judgment, plague, or famine, we will stand in front of this temple before you, for you are present in this temple. We will cry out to you for help in our distress, so that you will hear and deliver us.’ Now the Ammonites, Moabites, and men from Mount Seir are coming! When Israel came from the land of Egypt, you did not allow them to invade these lands. They bypassed them and did not destroy them. Look how they are repaying us! They come to drive us out of our allotted land which you assigned to us! Our God, will you not judge them? For we are powerless against this huge army that attacks us! We don’t know what we should do; we look to you for help.” saying,

All the men of Judah were standing before the Lord, along with their infants, wives, and children. Then in the midst of the assembly, the Lord’s Spirit came upon Jachaziel son of Zechariah, son of Benaiah, son of Jeiel, son of Mattaniah, a Levite and descendant of Asaph. He said: “Pay attention, all you people of Judah, residents of Jerusalem, and King Jehoshaphat! This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Don’t be afraid and don’t panic because of this huge army! For the battle is not yours, but God’s. Tomorrow march down against them as they come up the Ascent of Ziz. You will find them at the end of the ravine in front of the Desert of Jeruel. You will not fight in this battle. Take your positions, stand, and watch the Lord deliver you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Don’t be afraid and don’t panic! Tomorrow march out toward them; the Lord is with you!’”

Jehoshaphat bowed down with his face toward the ground, and all the people of Judah Lord and worshiped him. Then some Levites, from the Kohathites and Korahites, got up and loudly praised the Lord God of Israel. and the residents of Jerusalem fell down before the

Early the next morning they marched out to the Desert of Tekoa. When they were ready to march, Jehoshaphat stood up and said: “Listen to me, you people of Judah and residents of Jerusalem! Trust in the Lord your God and you will be safe! Trust in the message of his prophets and you will win.”He met with the people and appointed musicians to play before the Lord and praise his majestic splendor. As they marched ahead of the warriors they said: “Give thanks to the Lord, for his loyal love endures.”

When they began to shout and praise, the Lord suddenly attacked the Ammonites, Moabites, and men from Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated.

Our church for the past few weeks have been talking about being victors and warriors of the light and using the full armour of God to achieve the aims. I believe that another weapon that we can use is the weapon of praise.

I was not really feeling well and was suffering from periods of fatigue due to my sickness a while back. To be honest, I did not really had the strength or the motivation to seek the lord during these times. So as I read the story during my quiet time, I felt the Holy Spirit talking to me. Telling me to draw closer to the lord even in times of distress or even when I was not feeling well and experiencing fatigue.

In the daily bread that I read in the morning, Pastor Gloria Copeland was suffering from fatigue due to ministering long hours. She did not even have the energy to close the service after the meeting. Her solution to the problem was to praise the lord with her whole heart, mind and body. The tiredness left her and she was energised by the presence of God.

Similarly in the verses, when the people of Judah faced an adversary that they could not overcome, they turned to the Lord and started praising him.

They could have always ran away or submit to their fates.

They could have tried preparing by stocking on weapons or even spending time with their loved ones.

Instead, they praised the Lord as they knew the blessings that the Lord had for them that the people of Judah had inherited through Abraham. And the Lord came and struck down their adversaries for them.

From this day onwards, whenever I am feeling sick or tired, I pray that I would always be reminded to seek the Lord and praise him for he had taken away all our sicknesses and diseases by his stripes.

I also pray that when Guowei and Huiman are feeling tired and lethegic from the training in Pulau Tekong, they would also be reminded that the Lord have given us a weapon of praise to combat the aches and fatigue from training.

Sit Tight
Walk Right
Stand Up and Fight

Good Friday

The Way of the Cross

Some of us stay at the cross,
Some of us wait at the tomb,
Quickened and raised with Christ
Yet lingering still in the gloom.

Some of us ‘bide at the Passover feast
With Pentecost all unknown,
The triumphs of grace in the heavenly place
That our Lord has made His own.

If the Christ who died had stopped at the cross,
His work had been incomplete.
If the Christ who was buried had stayed in the tomb,
He had only known defeat,

But the way of the cross never stops at the cross
And the way of the tomb leads on
To victorious grace in the heavenly place
Where the risen Lord has gone.

Annie Johnson Flint

First of all, I apologise again for the late message, been in and out of the hospital for checkups regarding my anemia for the past few weeks. Been struggling with this sickness of mine for 2 whole years, till date have not really found a real reason behind the problem but I will continue to have faith in God and be patient with him as I believe that although physical healing is important, but I believe that the healing of the mind and spirit is of greater priority to him.

Thinking back, it was on the Good Friday 2 years ago where I decided to raise up my hands at TCT at Bukit Merah during the Good Friday Program to receive the Lord. Since then, I have faced many problems in my NS life, with my superiors, with my health, with my family and I had to change houses due to financial issues in the family. To say the truth, I really struggled with the problems I had at that time. At that period, I always told myself that it was a test that the Lord was putting me through to test my character and he was showing me that there are some things in life that cannot be controlled by my own free will. No matter how well I perform at work or in school, no matter how hard I worked to maintain my health, there are things in life that are planned by God that may not go your way and I have learnt to accept that during my ordeal during that period but I think I would share a bit about my own testimony in posts to come.

Now, I'll just focus on today itself.

Today, I went down to my spiritual father, Chris's, place to celebrate Good Friday.

Firstly, we started of with some icebreaker games to get to know each other better. I have to thank Nat ( not sure whether its the correct way to spell it), Annabelle and Leonard for the preparations.

After that, we watched a japanese movie called " Jesus is my Boss".

The show was about the true life story of a man called Hiroyuki Suzuki.

About Hiroyuki Suzuki:

Born in Osaka, Japan in 1955, Suzuki became a member of the Yakuza, Japan's organized crime groups, at the age of 17. With the tattoos of carps and mythical beasts all over his upper body and conspicuously missing pinkie fingers, he was involved in hoodlumism for the better part of two decades.

In 1989, a potentially fatal error led him to flee for his life from more than 5,000 Yakuza members, including his fellow brothers. He was in constant fear of being killed, and living as a fugitive completely wore him out. In the following year, with the support of his Korean wife's prayers, he repented to God and joined a church in Tokyo.

In 1992, Suzuki along with a handful of peer Yakuza converts led a six-month evangelical march throughout Japan, lugging a huge wooden cross. Similar walking tours took place in South Korea and Hawaii, which eventually developed into Mission Barabbas, a missionary group organized by Suzuki and other Yakuza converts.

Suzuki gained enough attention to earn a speaking engagement at the President's Prayer Breakfast at the White House in 1998, along with President Bill Clinton and the Rev. Billy Graham, which generated extensive media coverage internationally.

The 49-year-old convert is currently a pastor of the Siloam Christ Church in Chiba, Japan, and continues to deliver his life story and the Gospel of Jesus to various non-Christian and charity groups all over the globe.

Suzuki has authored memoirs and self-help publications in Japan, including "Anyone Can Start Over" (Asuka-Shinsha, 2001), "Beloved, Forgiven" (Raiin Shuppan, 2000), "The Tattooed Christian" (Waseda Shuppan, 1998), and "How To Start Over From Living Below The Breadline: A Memoir by the Tattooed Pastor" (Kodansha, 2002).

What was also added in the movie was about the reconcilation of the family between him and his wife at the end and the people he touched not because of what he has done but what God has done to turn his life 360 degrees around.

After the show, I heard 2 testimonies about my brother Saysern and Annabelle on similar works of God in their lives.

As I heard the testimonies, I began to ponder about my personal issues too. I believe that God is in fact changing my life slowly. I never really had a great relationship with my parents and my siblings in my life. My dad and mum were always at loggerheads at each other regarding lifestyle differences and financial issues. They always used the children as a reason why they do not divorce. Initially, I was sad and angry at such remarks when I was younger. But as time pass, I grew numb and emotionless to such remarks and my parents. Like what Annabelle mentioned, the worst thing that can happen to a person is the numbing of the emotions. After the encounter weekend, I pray that my heart will never be hardened like that again that I no longer feel any emotions to people around me or worse, to myself.

During that period when I was growing up as a teenager, I always felt resentment towards my brother for not really being there for me when I needed a listening ear in the family as my sister was too young and my parents were juist impossible to talk to (I'm sure some of you think the same way too). I never really had a great relationship with my brother as I felt that he was too distant, busy with his church (another reason why I did not join the church earlier), always taking care of his cell members before the family. Basically, he was never there when I needed him the most till the point that I just treated him to be non-exsistent in the family. There was this sense of jealousy as well as my mum would compare me with my brother with him always being superior in results and in physical fitness ( I used to be overweight and would pant after running 400m). So even now, I do not want my sister to go through the same situation I did ( I hope not as now she has her spiritual family behind her) and I always try my best to just be there for her when she needs me the most.

But I sense that God is slowly showing me the reconcilation of the family through him. My relationship with my brother is improving as now I am spending more time with him and I'm starting to understand more about the reponsibilities and problems he too was facing at that time as I juggle with work, my personal hobbies, church, family, my health and soon to come, studies in the NUS. But God has been good and I can see my relationship with my brother improving by the day.

For my parents, I no longer feel resentment towards them but rather I start to appreciate them more in my life and my parents seldom quarrel with each other anymore. In a way, there is more peace and quiet in the family but in another aspect, I fear it is the numbing of the emotions for each other after so many years of quarrelling. But I'll continue to pray and hope that God will do miricles in theirs lives just like what he did for the yazuka and his wife in the movie.

As I close my post for the day, I pray that every Good Friday I will be remembered of what God did on the cross for me and that he keeps my heart soft and never allow them to harden and be emotionless to the people around me again.

Eph 6:10-20 Finally, be strengthened in the Lord and in the strength of his power. Clothe yourselves with the full armor of God so that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world rulers of this darkness, against the spiritual force of evil in the heavens. For this reason, take up the full armor of God so that you may be able to stand your ground on the evil day, and having done everything, to stand. Stand firm therefore, by fastening the belt of truth around your waist, by putting on the breastplate of righteousness, by fitting your feet with the preparation that comes from the good news of peace, and in all of this, by taking up the shield of faith with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation and the swordof the Spirit, which is the word of God. With every prayer and petition, pray at all times in the Spirit, and to this end be alert, with all perseverance and requests for all the saints. Pray for me also, that I may be given the message when I begin to speak – that I may confidently make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may be able to speak boldly as I ought to speak.